Review Club #2 – Beyond Clueless

beyond-clueless

Welcome back to Review Club!

 

First up, we have the lovely Abbi, from abbiosbiston:

Writer/Director Charlie Lyne explores modern morality through the medium of the teen movies of the last thirty to forty years with a particular focus on the high school experience. Lyne divides his film into five chapters dissecting different elements of the journey through the teen years looking at everything from burgeoning sexuality to the ultimate transition into adulthood. This is mostly done by introducing a concept and then flashing through a series of illustrative scenes from various teen movies (and sometimes not teen movies??) While Lyne is definitely onto an interesting concept in the idea that we develop many of our expectations for life as well as our moral tenets from the movies, particularly during our formative years I can’t help but wonder if he’s reading too much into films like Idle Hands. And as he is the only voice in the film (not literally) it’s hard to get away from the feeling that you’re being treated to some kid’s film studies university thesis, which could have benefitted from some other expert opinions. I also wonder about some of the films he’s left out, Carrie being the most obvious (you know… and more than a passing nod to Clueless). If you’re a teen movie fan it’s interesting to see some favourites dissected, but there’s nothing groundbreaking here. 2.5/5

 

Up next, the always funny Eric, from The IPC:

BEYOND CLUELESS 2014

When this movie first started, during the first fifteen minutes or so, I kept thinking to myself, what the fuck have I gotten myself in to??? I’m a grown man who can make my own decisions and don’t have to subject myself to this. But then I remembered I was doing this for Melanie because I really like her so I pressed on. The first fifteen minutes of this consist of Fairuza Balk doing voice-over, over-thinking and over – analyzing high school movies such as The Craft (which she’s in), Disturbing Behavior, Mean Girls and Slap Her – She’s French. There’s not much that irritates me more than when people over think things and read too much into shit, so I wasn’t having a good time.

But then, when I was about to lose all hope – at the twenty minute mark to be precise – I witnessed one of the coolest montages I have ever seen. This movie is about high school movies so they get into a lot of them, but this particular set of images really impressed me. It’s people partying and dancing and slo-mo and it was just kind of incredible. I would advise watching it just for that alone – but I’m a huge fan of the montage.

And then they do it again a little bit later with a bunch of people fighting. And they close the movie with another incredible selection of shots of people jacking off and getting an orgasm (but I am also a big fan of the orgasm).

preponO

Anyway – in the end I liked this movie. There’s some bullshit over analyzing throughout but I think the overall product is worth a watch.

4 out 5 Prepons Orgasming

 

And finally, my turn:

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Beyond Clueless

Narrated by: Fairuza Balk

beyond_clueless

So, this movie. I wish I could say I loved it, and it was a wonderful insight into the world of teen films, but I’d be lying. It wasn’t bad, but it definitely wasn’t great. And spoilerific, my goodness. It’s a good thing that I’d already seen most of the films showcased, otherwise I might have been upset (spoilers are one of my biggest pet-peeves). The narration, while mostly interesting, was rather lacklustre, with Balk sounding mostly bored as she droned on. And, as Eric and Abbi both noted, some of the films were bullshittingly over-analyzed, especially Idle Hands. I watched that segment with an incredulous “are you fucking serious??” look on my face. The director/writer Charlie Lyne also seems to be obsessed with finding the “hidden homoeroticism” in films, going into depth about it, most notably in the segments on Jeepers Creepers (which isn’t really a teen film to begin with, they’re young adults in University, but that’s besides the point), and EuroTrip. And as much as I would like to imagine Justin Long getting it on with a dude, he’s obviously not gay, his sister remarking on his ability to score using his tummy tattoo as bait (“hey baby, wanna see my tattoo?” “why yes I do, Justin, yes I do”). And if Lyne sees eroticism, homo or otherwise, in that horrifying scene with the bodies hanging everywhere, I think he has bigger things than teen films to worry about. Also, the film is called Beyond Clueless. I would have loved to see a segment that was actually about Clueless. We’re treated to a few sporadic scenes, but nothing else. Actually, they glazed over a lot of teen films that I liked, I think most of the films in my Top 15 Teen Films article were either not there at all, or not discussed. Most notably missing were the John Hughes films. The only mention of The Breakfast Club we get is seeing it on a cinema billboard in a clip from another teen film. Kinda disappointing. So, all in all, decent, but nothing to write home about. It gets a 6/10 from me.

M.

 

And that’s it for this time! Come back in 2 weeks for more!! 🙂

My Top 15 Teen Films

Most teen films are the sort of thing that you’ll watch over and over when you’re a teenager, but then once an adult you try watch it again and are horrified by how awful it actually was. But every so often a gem will be made that somehow remains fun to watch even in our old age. Here’s my list of the teen films that I loved as a kid, and still love now. Enjoy! 🙂

 

NUMBER 15

15 Just One of the Girls

Title: Just One of the Girls (also known as Anything for Love)
Starring: Corey Haim, Nicole Eggert, Cameron Bancroft, Johannah Newmarch, Gabe Khouth, Rachel Hayward, Lochlyn Munro, Kevin McNulty, and Wendy Van Riesen
Released in: 1993
Directed by: Michael Keusch
Written by: Raul Fernandez
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: To avoid bullies on his way to a new school, Chris dresses up as a girl. It works like a charm, until he’s caught in costume by one of his teachers and is forced to stay in disguise. Things get tricky when he meets the girl of his dreams, and the girl’s brother tries to get with him.
Why I Love It: It’s a by-the-numbers gender-swap film, but it’s still fun to see Corey Haim in drag. He does a good job of pretending to be a girl, and is actually passable, unlike so many others in the genre.

 

NUMBER 14

14 Just One of the Guys

Title: Just One of the Guys
Starring: Joyce Hyser, Clayton Rohner, Billy Jacoby, Toni Hudson, William Zabka, Leigh McCloskey, and Sherilyn Fenn
Released in: 1985
Directed by: Lisa Gottlieb
Written by: Dennis Feldman, Jeff Franklin
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After having her article passed over for an internship for a boy’s, Terri decides to enroll in a new school as a boy to prove that her article was passed over just because she’s a girl.
Why I Love It: Another gender-swap, but this is one of the best ones I’ve seen, from teen or adult fare. Joyce Hyser is hilariously wonderful, and actually makes for a rather attractive boy. But I’ve always liked the girly-boys, so I might be biased, hehe.

 

NUMBER 13

13 Cry-Baby

Title: Cry-Baby
Starring: Johnny Depp, Amy Locane, Ricki Lake, Traci Lords, Susan Tyrrell, Polly Bergen, Iggy Pop, Kim McGuire, Darren E Burrows, Stephen Mailer, and Kim Webb
Released in: 1990
Directed by: John Waters
Written by: John Waters
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A bad-boy (or Drape) with a heart of gold falls for a good girl (or Square), and while the Drapes are very accepting of the girl, the Squares are determined to keep them apart.
Why I Love It: By all accounts, this should be an awful movie. But I don’t know, I absolutely love it. It’s silly with some pretty shifty acting, and is nothing close to real life, but I dunno, it all just works.

 

NUMBER 12

12 Save the Last Dance

Title: Save the Last Dance
Starring: Julia Stiles, Sean Patrick Thomas, Kerry Washington, Fredro Starr, Terry Kinney, Bianca Lawson, Vince Green, Garland Whitt, and Dorothy Martin
Released in: 2001
Directed by: Thomas Carter
Written by: Duane Adler, Cheryl Edwards
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After her mother dies in an accident, a white teen moves to LA with her father. She attends a new school in a poor area of town where most of the students are black. There she meets a boy who rekindles her love of dance.
Why I Love It: I love dance movies, even ones where the lead character isn’t really that good at it (her final dance routine was less than impressive). And then pair the dancing with a schmoopy love story and some good dramatic scenes, and you’ve got yourself a winning formula for a successful teen film.

 

NUMBER 11

11 Juno

Title: Juno
Starring: Ellen Page, Michael Cera, Jennifer Garner, Jason Bateman, Allison Janney, JK Simmons, Olivia Thirlby, Daniel Clark, and Rainn Wilson
Released in: 2007
Directed by: Jason Reitman
Written by: Diablo Cody
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After getting pregnant by her best friend, a quirky teen decides to go ahead and have the baby, finding a couple to adopt the child in a PennySaver magazine.
Why I Love It: It’s fun, quirky, and witty, and has a good message. Most of the actors are surprisingly good (except Jennifer Garner, who plays a plank of wood, as usual), and the writing is awesome, despite the fact that no one on the planet talks like they do (not before the film came out, anyways).

 

NUMBER 10

10 Get Real

Title: Get Real
Starring: Ben Silverstone, Brad Gorton, Charlotte Brittain, Stacy Hart, Kate McEnery, and Patrick Nielsen
Released in: 1998
Directed by: Simon Shore
Written by: Patrick Wilde
Based On: The play of the same name by Patrick Wilde
5 Second Synopsis: This tenderly romantic film tells the story of Steve, a young man in a British prep school, as he struggles with coming out and falling in love with the class jock, John. Who, amazingly, falls in love with him as well. But their relationship starts to feel the strain as John constantly hides his sexuality, and refuses to acknowledge Steve in public.
Why I Love It: Such a poignant love story, and one that all too many teens go through at least once in their lives, gay or straight. Unfortunately, sometimes love just isn’t enough. This is a wonderful little film, with good acting and writing. Definitely one to see if you enjoy the genre.

 

NUMBER 9

9 Can't Hardly Wait

Title: Can’t Hardly Wait
Starring: Jennifer Love Hewitt, Ethan Embry, Seth Green, Charlie Korsmo, Lauren Ambrose, Peter Facinelli, Jaime Pressly, Jenna Elfman, Melissa Joan Hart, Breckin Meyer, and Jerry O’Connell
Released in: 1998
Directed by: Harry Elfont, Deborah Kaplan
Written by: Harry Elfont, Deborah Kaplan
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After being in love with the school hottie for years, a shy student decides to finally tell her how he feels about her at their class’ graduation party. Of course, shenanigans ensue.
Why I Love It: It’s fun, silly, sort of pointless, but that’s all part of it’s appeal. The actors do a great job acting like teenagers (no small feat, since most of the actors in the film are in their 20’s or 30’s). Grab your popcorn and prepare to laugh, swoon, and just have a good time.

 

NUMBER 8

8 Cruel Intentions

Title: Cruel Intentions
Starring: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Ryan Phillippe, Reese Witherspoon, Selma Blair, Sean Patrick Thomas, Joshua Jackson, Christine Baranski, Eric Mabius, and Swoosie Kurtz
Released in: 1999
Directed by: Roger Kumble
Written by: Roger Kumble
Based On: Les Liaisons Dangereuses by Choderlos de Laclos
5 Second Synopsis: Kathryn makes a bet that her step-brother, Sebastian, won’t be able to bed Annette (a virgin, who wants to wait until love). If he loses, Kathryn gets his Jaguar. If he wins, he gets Kathryn.
Why I Love It: Stronger writing and acting than most teen films of the time, and I guess it’s in part because of the fact that the source material was definitely not intended for kids. This is a definite gem of the 90’s.

 

NUMBER 7

7 Dazed and Confused

Title: Dazed and Confused
Starring: Jason London, Wiley Wiggins, Matthew McConaughey, Rory Cochrane, Ben Affleck, Joey Lauren Adams, Shawn Andrews, Marissa Ribisi, Anthony Rapp, Adam Goldberg, Sasha Jenson, Milla Jovovich, and Jeremy Fox
Released in: 1993
Directed by: Richard Linklater
Written by: Richard Linklater
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: It’s the last day of school at a high school in a small town in Texas in 1976. The upperclassmen are hazing the incoming freshmen, and everyone is trying to get stoned, drunk, or laid, even the football players that signed a pledge not to.
Why I Love It: They say if you remember the 70’s you weren’t there. I may not remember them (since I wasn’t born yet), but I got a good idea of things were like with this fun, sometimes crazy, film. It’s also fun to see a bunch of big name actors getting their starts here, including Ben Affleck, Matthew McConaughey, and Milla Jovovich. A total riot to watch, start to finish.

 

NUMBER 6

6 10 Things I Hate About You

Title: 10 Things I Hate About You
Starring: Heath Ledger, Julia Stiles, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Larisa Oleynik, David Krumholtz, Andrew Keegan, Susan May Pratt, Gabrielle Union, Larry Miller, Daryl Mitchell, and Allison Janney
Released in: 1999
Directed by: Gil Junger
Written by: Karen McCullah, Kirsten Smith
Based On: The Taming of the Shrew by William Shakespeare (loosely based :-p )
5 Second Synopsis: A popular teen can’t date until her tempermental older sister starts dating too, so her suitor decides to pay the school bad-boy to ask her out.
Why I Love It: Well written, well acted with lots and lots of eye candy, this is one of the very best teen films to come out of the 90’s. It was also my introduction to the hunky Heath Ledger, who’s career I followed after seeing him here.

 

NUMBER 5

5 The Goonies

Title: The Goonies
Starring: Sean Astin, Josh Brolin, Corey Feldman, Jeff Cohen, Kerri Green, Martha Plimpton, Ke Huy Quan, John Matuszak, Robert Davi, Joe Pantoliano, and Anne Ramsey
Released in: 1985
Directed by: Richard Donner
Written by: Chris Columbus
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After finding out that his family will loose their home to an unscrupulous developer who’s buying up the neighbourhood to tear everything down and build a golf course, a teen and his friends make a pact to find a hidden treasure of legend in a local cave.
Why I Love It: I might be skating along the lines of what’s a teen film and what’s a kid’s film here, but it’s so good that I decided to go ahead and put it in anyways. So much fun, a definite childhood classic. Everybody do the truffle shuffle!! hehe

 

NUMBER 4

4 Hackers

Title: Hackers
Starring: Jonny Lee Miller, Angelina Jolie, Jesse Bradford, Matthew Lillard, Renoly Santiago, Fisher Stevens, Laurence Mason, Lorraine Bracco, Marc Anthony, Wendell Pierce, and Alberta Watson
Released in: 1995
Directed by: Iain Softley
Written by: Rafael Moreu
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A group of teen hackers find out about a plot to capsize an oil tanker if millions of dollars aren’t sent to a specific bank account, and with the police hot on their trails, they have to find the hacker behind the crime before they’re the ones blamed for it.
Why I Love It: It was one of the first films to really get me interested in computers. And even though I was very disappointed to find out real hacking is nothing like what is shown in this film, I’ve always had my own computer ever since then. Plus, with the caliber of actors that they were able to attract and a good director, that means that this is one of the best made teen films out there. So much fun, so much eye candy, and to top it all off, a totally bitchin soundtrack.

 

NUMBER 3

2 Pretty in Pink

Title: Pretty in Pink
Starring: Molly Ringwald, Jon Cryer, Andrew McCarthy, Annie Potts, James Spader, Andrew Dice Clay, and Harry Dean Stanton
Released in: 1986
Directed by: Howard Deutch
Written by: John Hughes
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: When a rich boy and poor girl start dating, friends on either side will do anything to make sure they separate.
Why I Love It: One of the all time classics, this little teen film is so romantic sometimes that it’ll make you choke, and so funny in other times that you’ll pee yourself (ie: any scenes with Duckie. Love him!) All the teen romance clichés are here, and that’s because this film (and others around the same time) ‘invented’ all of them. Its look is very very 80’s, a lot of the clothes is hideous (especially that god damned pink dress at the end… what the hell were they thinking??? But I digress…), but it does nothing to take the wonderfulness of the film away. Plus, young James Spader. Meow.

 

NUMBER 2

3 The Breakfast Club

Title: The Breakfast Club
Starring: Emilio Estevez, Judd Nelson, Molly Ringwald, Anthony Michael Hall, Ally Sheedy, John Kapelos, and Paul Gleason
Released in: 1985
Directed by: John Hughes
Written by: John Hughes
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: Five very different teens are in an all detention in the school library. As the day goes by, they open up to each other and realize that they’re not as different as they thought.
Why I Love It: One of the quintessential teen films, this is one of the movies that started it all, with a group of actors affectionately known as The Brat Pack. I’m pretty sure I don’t need to explain why I love this one. It hits the high-school-life-nail right on its head. Amazing. And Judd Nelson as Bender? Holy hot!

 

And now for my number 1, well…. I’m going to cheat here, big time. There was no way that I was going to be able to choose one or the other as my very favourite, so I decided to make my number 1 a tie. And so, here’s my…

 

NUMBERS 1

1 Empire Records

Title: Empire Records
Starring: Rory Cochrane, Johnny Whitworth, Anthony LaPaglia, Robin Tunney, Renée Zellweger, Liv Tyler, Ethan Embry, Coyote Shivers, Brendan Sexton III, Maxwell Caulfield, and Debi Mazar
Released in: 1995
Directed by: Allan Moyle
Written by: Carol Heikkinen
Based On: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: The employees of an independent music store learn about each other as they try anything to stop the store from being absorbed by a large chain.
Why I Love It: I can’t even explain how much I love this film. I saw it when it first came out (I was 14), and I fell instantly in love with it, and have been ever since. Thankfully, it still holds up well today, and I give it a watch every once in a while, and it never fails to make me smile.

 

1 Clueless

Title: Clueless
Starring: Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy, Paul Rudd, Donald Faison, Elisa Donovan, Breckin Meyer, Jeremy Sisto, Justin Walker, Julie Brown, Twink Caplan, Wallace Shawn, and Dan Hedaya
Released in: 1995
Directed by: Amy Heckerling
Written by: Amy Heckerling
Based On: Emma by Jane Austen (loosely based :-p )
5 Second Synopsis: Popular, rich girls Cher and Dionne decide to take a new, frumpy student under their wing and give her a makeover, while their love lives run amok.
Why I Love It: I don’t think I need to explain how awesome this film is. It’s over the top and ridiculous in so many ways, but the actors are all perfect in their roles, and the film comes off as completely sweet and charming instead of grating and self-indulgent (the way I imagine teens in that world actually are ;-p ). They could not have picked a better actress for the main role of Cher, Alicia Silverstone is absolutely perfect.

 

And that’s my list!! What are your favourite teen films? Let me know in the comments, and stay tuned for more!! 😀

M.

Teen Heartthrobs – Then and Now, part 2

A few months ago, I made a post about some of my favourite “heartthrobs” from the 80’s and 90’s (which is still one of my most viewed posts!! Woo! hehe). I’d promised way back then that I would continue the post to add all those that I’d forgotten, and then I just got side-tracked with other stuff. But I’m ready to take on part 2 now, so without any further ado, let’s get this show on the road!

 

Vincent Kartheiser

I first saw Vincent in such teen films as Alaska, Masterminds, Strike! (also called All I Wanna Do), and Crime + Punishment in Suburbia, as well, of course, as Connor in the great vampire show Angel. Quite effeminate, he’s definitely not for everyone’s tastes, but I’ve always liked the little girly boys, so I fell in love with him on first sight.

So what’s he up to now?
Vincent Kartheiser now

While he never really stopped working after Angel ended in 2004, his roles were either small, voice overs, or in relatively unknown works. But he became well known again after landing his role as Pete Campbell in the 60’s drama Mad Men, which is still on now. He also has two films in production, a short called Winter Light, and a drama called Day Out of Days, with Melanie Griffith.

 

Skeet Ulrich

After a few bit parts between 1989 and 1994, Skeet finally got his big break in the teen horror flicks The Craft and Scream, both out in 1996. But then, after a small role in the Jack Nicholson film As Good As It Gets in 1997, he kind of slid off the grid. He got steady work, but nothing really big.

So what’s he up to now?
Skeet Ulrich now

The only thing he’s done of any real consequence is the post-apocalyptic drama Jericho that ran from 2006 to 2008. He also did a season of one of the zillion Law & Order spinoffs in 2011. As of right now, he’s got two TV movies in production, as well as a dramady called Lost in Austin.

 

Ryan Phillippe

After a few small roles on TV and film, Ryan got his big break in the 1996 drama White Squall, with Jeff Bridges. After that role, he got a crap-ton of work, mostly in teen and young adult fare like Nowhere, I Know What You Did Last Summer, 54, and Cruel Intentions, which is probably his most famous role.

So what’s he up to now?
Ryan Phillippe now

He never stopped working after Cruel Intentions, but I have never heard of any of the stuff he’s been in, all the way till The Lincoln Lawyer with Matthew McConnaughey in 2011. He’s currently got two films in production, and looks like he’ll be trying his luck on the small screen. He’s working on a pilot for a mystery show called Secrets & Lies with Juliette Lewis.

 

Robert Sean Leonard

The first time I saw Robert was in Swing Kids. We watched it in history class while I was in high school. I liked him so much that I went on to find more of his movies, going all the way back to his first starring role in 1987’s My Best Friend is a Vampire, which is indeed as silly as it sounds, and it’s awesome! hehe He also had notable roles in Dead Poets Society (don’t forget the kleenex for this one), Much Ado About Nothing, and Killer: A Journal of Murder.

So what’s he up to now?
Robert Sean Leonard now

He worked steadily till 1998, and then roles started to come much less frequently. But then, in 2004, he hit the small screen jackpot, landing the role of Dr James Wilson on the medical drama House, which ran eight seasons. This year he joined the cast of the sci-fi show Falling Skies, which is in its fourth season.

 

River Phoenix

The first film that really made me notice River Phoenix was Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (which is still my favourite of the franchise). He wasn’t in the film for very long, as he was playing the young Indy, but he was memorable. He started acting when he was 12, and soon showed that he was very talented, blowing everyone away with his role in Stand By Me, among others. He even got an Oscar nomination for Best Supporting Actor for his work in My Own Private Idaho, which he should have won. He worked on 1 to 4 projects a year, until 1993.

So what’s he up to now?
River Phoenix

Unfortunately, River’s addictions got the better of him, and in the wee hours of the morning on October 31, 1993, he collapsed outside of the Los Angeles nightclub The Viper Room (partially owned at that time by Johnny Depp, who was a good friend of River’s). He was pronounced dead at 1:51AM, at Cedars-Sinai hospital. The official cause of death was “heart failure due to acute multiple drug intoxication”. He was only 23.

 

Noah Hathaway

After making a bunch of commercials (he started when he was three), he finally broke through and got his first real acting job at the age of 7 in the sci-fi show Battlestar Galactica. After doing that show for two years, he got few other small roles, mostly TV guest spots, until he struck gold in 1984, when he won the role of Atreyu in the classic The NeverEnding Story. He worked steadily for the next two years (most notably in the weird fantasy flick Troll, where he played a character called *gasp!* Harry Potter!!), but he was never able to recapture the success that he had with The NeverEnding Story.

So what’s he up to now?
Noah Hathaway now

He stopped acting completely in 1986, only taking one role in 1996. He opened a dance studio for a while, but stopped after an injury. He went on to get a black belt in Kempo Karate and did some competitions. He married, and later he and his wife opened a shop in California building and fixing “chopper” motorcycles. He occasionally still does appearances in fan expos and conventions. He’s recently decided to give acting another try, doing one project a year since 2012, starting with the odd crime film Sushi Girl.

 

Nick Carter

Nick Carter began his career wanting to be an actor. He did lots of auditioning and landed a few commercials. He also got a bit part in Edward Scissorhands. But it was to be a music career that would rocket him to fame. In 1992, with little Nick a mere 12 years old, the Backstreet Boys are formed. In May 1993, they had their first live gig in Orlando. They recorded their first single We’ve Got It Going On a few months after that. And the rest, as they say, is history.

So what’s he up to now?
Nick Carter Now

He’s made two solo albums, both of which sold relatively well. He made a reality show called House of Carters with all 4 of his siblings. It only lasted one season. He was recently back on tour with the Backstreet Boys for a reunion tour for them along with the New Kids on the Block. This year, he recorded a duet album with Jordan Knight (from NKOTB), called Nick & Knight, and they’re due to start touring in September.

 

Nicholas Brendon

Nicholas won my heart the second I saw him, way back in 1997, in season 1 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. And it really was the best episode for me to see first. It was the Xander-centric episode The Pack, where he and four bullies are possessed by evil hyena spirits. And of course I’ve been hooked ever since (to both Buffy and Nicky, hehe).

So what’s he up to now?
Nicholas Brendon now

While he’s never been able to recreate the success he had during Buffy‘s seven year run, he’s always kept busy. He’s done voice-over work for video games (mostly Buffy games), and tons of guest spots on various TV shows. Then, in 2007, he got a permanent spot (albeit a small one) on the FBI drama Criminal Minds, as Penelope Garcia’s boyfriend, fellow FBI hacker Kevin Lynch. He’s trying his luck on the big screen again (past efforts are better left untalked about) with the thriller Indigo. There’s also a TV show in the works with a 2015 release date called Chainsaw Sally, which looks to be a horror comedy, starring a few other actors known for horror and fantasy, including Debbie Rochon and Tristan Risk.

 

Jason & Jeremy London

I may be cheating a little here, but really, you can’t talk about one London brother and not the other. While Jason made his name on the big screen with his iconic role as Randall ‘Pink’ Floyd in Dazed and Confused, Jeremy mostly stuck to the small screen, making many guest appearances in all genres of show, and his most known role, that of Griffin Holbrooke on the drama Party of Five, which ran for 6 years, 5 of which Jeremy was in. He didn’t make that many jumps to the big screen, but his most famous movie role is Mallrats, which, I kid you not, I’d always thought was Jason in the role! I found out it was actually Jeremy literally two seconds ago. Way to go, me. But while he wasn’t in that particular film, Jason was in many others, including Man in the Moon, Blood Ties, and the fabulous To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar. After Party of Five ended in 2002, Jeremy floundered about for two years, until he got a recurring role on the drama 7th Heaven, which lasted two years.

So what are they up to now?
Jason & Jeremy London Now

Both of them have tons of projects in their film-and-tv-ographies, Jason a ton and a half, but I can recognize literally about 1 out of 12 titles, and even less titles that I’ve actually seen. Most recently, Jason has a small role in the crime drama Untold, and Jeremy was in a sci-fi show called Dark Rising: Warrior of Worlds, neither of which I knew existed. On the horizon, Jeremy has nine projects (one movie completed, seven in post-production, and one merely announced), Jason has seven (two completed, four in post-production, and one currently filming). And out of all these, there’s only one that looks even remotely interesting, a TV show inspired by the story of Jack the Ripper called 7 Faces of Jack the Ripper. I’m not sure how good it’ll be, if it’s good at all, cause the acting in the trailer is pretty atrocious…

 

Ethan Embry

Ethan has an oddball look (and personality to match), but I always thought it was a charming oddball look. If I’m not mistaken, the first time I saw him was in Empire Records, which was, and remains, the teen film to top all teen films. But that, in 1995, was hardly his first rodeo, having done 10 projects before it (none that I’ve actually heard of, but that’s besides the point). After that, his popularity sky-rocketed, and he made two, three, sometimes up to six projects a year till 2003. First, teen films (White Squall, That Thing You Do!, Can’t Hardly Wait, and Disturbing Behaviour), and then more adult roles more suited to his age. Most of his work after 1998 is on TV, either as a show regular, as in the detective drama Dragnet, or as a guest star, of which he did many.

So what’s he up to now?
Ethan Embry Now

Ethan never stopped working, but looking through the list of projects (both TV and film), I only recognize a few names, and even the ones I recognized I haven’t seen. I think the only thing I’ve seen him in recently(ish) is Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, in which he only had a small part. He was a regular in season 2 of the fantasy show Once Upon a Time (which I find boring as heck, but anyways..). He’s got four projects on the way, two completed, one in post-production, and one in pre-production.

And that’s all she wrote!! And in this case, she’s me. I’m the she, and that’s all I wrote. I’m finished, is what I’m saying here :-p

Enjoy my list? Who were your favourite teen heartthrobs? Let me know in the comments!! 🙂

M.